Chapter 36: Chapter 36

Warning: Long chapter

Author Pov

"I was abandoned by my mother." Xander's first sentence was enough to rip apart Amelia's heart.

She knows the pain of being abandoned by your own parents. Especially when it's happened to your closest friend. Lily had gone through the same. She was abandoned by her father and her mother raised her.

Amelia had seen Lily growing up. They are friends from the day they born so she had seen everything. Lily's tears. Her being bullied for having single parent. Her doing everything to make her mother's life's easy.

"My mother and father had a love marriage. He married her when she was just 19 years old and he was 21 at that time. He got her pregnant. They both were so much in love that they thought of marrying and starting a family. They were happy. Everything was going well till I turned a year old."

He stoppe to take a deep breath. Amelia placed her warm palm on his back rubbing it soothingly.

"My mother started having conflicts with my father because of money. She wanted more and more. My father did everything to fulfil her wishes. To give her everything as he loved her too much. Too much for his own good. He even sometimes had accidents during bike racing but she never noticed. The only thing she wanted was money and a great lifestyle."

"She started neglecting me. My father and her households. Meeting different rich people she started going to clubs. And what you can even expect from 20 years old woman. Who just recently hit her puberty. She just wanted to enjoy her life and she realized that I and her marriage was coming in her way. My father started getting tired of her continuous nagging so one night they had a huge argument. She went out and in the morning my father."

He gulped heavily pausing a bit. "He found her in one of his friend's house sleeping with him. She cheated on him. And you know it wasn't the first time." Amelia almost gasped in shock.

She suddenly felt so bad for Noah. She knew the feeling of getting cheated on and she didn't even want to imagine that how would he had felt after all they had a son together.

"My father's friend had a girlfriend as well. And she was the one who asked my father to come to her boyfriend's house and they both caught the cheaters. The woman knew that her boyfriend was cheating for some time so she decided to reveal the truth to my father as well. He was heartbroken. He did everything to satisfy her but that time he realized the one who doesn't want to satisfy you can't satisfy that person no matter how much you try."

"My mother did nothing except she accepted to divorce him and handed him my full custody. She didn't even fight for her son. She was begging to get rid of my presence. And the chance she got she threw me away."

Xander said all of this with an emotionless face. He had no sadness or hurt in his eyes. Disappointment yes he looked disappointed but not sad for the things his mother did.

"Now you know why I love my father so much. He did everything to give me the best life. But I failed to be the best son. I failed my father. His teachings. For some selfish reason." Sadness flooded in his blue eyes when he talked about his father.

"I was always a quiet and introverted guy. My father told me about everything with honesty when I turned 15. He wanted me to know about everything so I wouldn't ask about anything. He didn't want me to blame my mother saying she was young and it was always her decision to be with someone she wanted to. And he can't control her."

"But for me, break up was fine. But cheating wasn't. She would have left us instead of cheating." He snarled the word cheating making Amelia gulped seeing how dark his gaze become.

"I never got tangled with anyone. I had no friends or even a single good relationship with anyone. I wanted a quiet life. But then I met an angel." A small smile appeared on his lips. Amelia instantly understood.

His late wife. Mia Storm.

"Mia met me when I was 13. She was only 8 years old then. She was the same as I was. Quiet, distant and introvert type. But she had a big heart. Too much kindness. And innocence for her own good. Some guys were bullying her when I first met her. I saved her and she instantly pursued me to be her friend. She was one of an annoying leech."

He chuckled completing his sentence. Amelia almost smiled at his bright face but stopped when his smile fell and a hint of sadness appeared in his gaze. Once again.

"I don't know why. But her presence. Her innocence. Her smile. Her. Everything forced me to fell for her. Too hard. I started loving her. Or that's what I thought." Xander stopped for a second.

"When I turned 23 and she became 18 she told me about her boyfriend. I met that guy one time only. I didn't really like him he was 12 years older than her. But didn't say much as she was too much in love with him. Of course, it hurt me. Every bit of it hurted me. Every time hearing her saying that man's name with so much love in her eyes sliced opened my healed wounds again and again. That shit hurt more than my mother abandoning me I don't know why."

He laughed through his sad eyes. Amelia didn't laugh or even smiled. She could see the pain all over his face. His eyes. He was holding himself back from breaking down.

His fists tightened on the bed sheets that he didn't even notice he was holding. Amelia wanted to console him but she knew this time nothing could help him.

"After a year watching her roaming around him and being all smitten by that old man I didn't know what to do. I don't know what happened to me that night. Why I did that. Why I did that vicious thing. Why I used the same title I hate the most on that innocent girl who did nothing? I don't know why."

FlashBack

Xander Pov

"Xander look at this dress. Is it looking good? I want to look amazing tonight. I have a gift for Max and--" I interrupted her spitting out something in anger.

"Can you not just again start with your Max this Max that. I am tired of hearing his shitty name from your mouth every fucking second." I snarled getting up from the bed.

She looked at me surprised yet speechless face. She placed the dress on the bed before coming towards me with worried eyes.

"Xander are you ok. For some past months, I am noticing your behaving too much different. And your also avoiding me a lot recently. What happened." That time I just wanted to fell on my knees and tell her that how crazily I love her.

I wanted to yell at her for being so blind. For not able to see how much her continuous ignorance was hurting me.

"Nothing's wrong Mia. I just want you to stop taking that man's name. Especially when you're with me stop mentioning him." She frowned at my words crossing her arms.

"You're confusing me so much, Xander. I don't know what's with you and your no reason disliking towards Max I---"

"Shut up. I told you to not take his name." She flinched at my sudden burst out.

"That's enough Xander. You have no right to yell at me for absolutely no reason. I wanted to tell you something important but I think you have lost your mind right now. Get out and come back when your brain will be in its right place."

She said with a stern tone. That's what I loved about her the most. She never liked disrespect. She hated the most was someone trying to empower her. But today I wasn't having it.

"Why what's the thing you wanna tell me. It will be again about that bastard. Isn't it." Mia turned around to look at me with anger in her eyes.

"What the hell is wrong with you Xander. I had enough of you insulting Max ----" Before she could complete her sentence I grabbed her slender arms roughly pulling her near me.

"STOP TAKING HIS NAME. STOP. STOP. STOP." I yelled right at her face making her look at me with wide eyes. Her green orbs almost popped out of their sockets at my tone.

But I was out of my mind. I felt like digging everything around me. I can't tolerate it anymore. I needed to tell her. I wanted to show her that she's mine. I wanted to make her mine. And I completely lost my mind.

"What's wrong with me. You want to know what's wrong with me. You. Your continuous blindness is doing wrong to me. Why can't you see what you're doing to me? Why can't you find the truth in my eyes? Why can't you see how much you're hurting me, Mia? Why."

I said pulling her more closer to me. Her hands fell on my shoulders. Her elbows stayed attached to my chest but her body was frozen. Only her eyes stared in mine with shock present in them.

"I can't do this. I can't keep on acting like it's not hurting me. Like I am fine with everything. Like I can see you with another man. I can't do this. Not anymore." Her lips started trembling to make me gulp in desire.

I let my one arm slid around her tiny waist pulling closer to the extent that the distance between us got covered completely. Her one foot landed above mine reducing the distance even more but I didn't mind it. Her weight was nothing against mine.

"I love you, Mia. Why can't you see I loved you for years. I craved for you in my every breath. I desire you in my every wish. I love you so much. Why can't you see it."

Tears appeared in her eyes but I had gone too far from coming back. All I had in my mind was now or never. And that thought solely was enough to destroy the last co science I had.

"X-Xander w-what are you. I-I. You. H-how." She stuttered out making me chuckle at how shocked she was.

"Yes, Mia. I also don't know how. When. Why. But I only know that I love you and I want you. I just want you and only you. That's all I know. Please give me a chance. I promise I will treat you better than that man." She shook her head and suddenly I felt a hard tug on my shoulders. She was struggling to get away from me.

"Have you gone nuts Xander? I don't love you. I love Max. I ---"

"DON'T CALL HIS NAME. I DON'T CARE. I KNOW YOU WILL LEARN TO LOVE ME. JUST GIVE ME A GOD DAMN CHANCE." I yelled making her flinch hard in my arms.

I tugged her more against my chest before grabbing her jaw roughly. Her face turned towards me as she stared at me in horror. Her movements got seized when I did something which I never knew I was capable of.

I slammed my lips against hers kissing her as all my life depended on that kiss. I didn't think of the consequences. I didn't think of how much of a disgusting step I took just because of the madness of the mare moment.

Sealing her lips tightly with mine. I let myself fulfil the desire I had for years. I kissed her so hard that it didn't fail to bruise her delicate lips. Her arms didn't stop hitting me and her body thrashing in my embrace but I was too gone crazy to understand anything.

I was too mad to see what the biggest damage I was causing her. And that wasn't the last thing I did.

Roughly jerking her forward in my embrace I moved towards the bed without breaking the kiss. My hands held her tightly on the spot. I tasted her blood. Her tears. I heard her whimpers. She pleaded but I was out of my mind.

We both fell on the bed. Her body got pressed against the mattress while mine against hers. In all of this my leg hit the side table making the lamp fell on the floor. Finally breaking the kiss I placed my forehead on hers breathing crazily.

"S-stop Xander don't do---" Her words got cut short when the room's door got slammed open.

"Babe are you ok I heard the crashing sou---" The guy stood stiff in the door stared at our inappropriate position.

Maxim or should I say Mia's boyfriend stared at us with shock yet hurt eyes. His accusing eyes glared at me then at Mia who helplessly muttered his name.

"M-Max--" She tried pushing me but I was too out of my mind to see how helpless I had made her. I didn't stand up instead I just stared at the guy whose eyes filled with tears with a small smirk.

"I can't believe this Mia. Your cheating on me. After all the love and care. Your cheating on me."

He whispered making the girl under me shook her head helplessly. She again pushed my chest and this time I did something which I never knew I will regret the whole of my life.

I should have said the truth. I should have proved her innocence. Her loyalty. But I did what not even an enemy would do. But today a friend. A vicious selfish friend yet a lover like me did.

I lied. For myself.

"Yes, she's cheating on you. Because she doesn't love you. She loves me."

________________________________________

Ufff. Xandy you were my eye candy. How could you? Jk

I think Xander's past might take one or two more ep as there is still a lot of things to be explained yet.

Next will be up soon. Keep liking for more interesting updates .

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Till the next Adios.