Chapter 11: Chapter 11

Cullum drops us off in front of a small intimate Indian restaurant uptown. The smells floating in the air hit you instantly the moment the elevator doors open. If I had to use one word to describe the restaurant it would be exotic. Dim lights casting shadows off the dark rich coloured walls and beautiful candles flutter with light. Music quietly plays in the background as a lady sings about heartbreak. We're seated next to a glass window looking over the city. I happen to look up and admire the black night skies shimmering with stars. They look like little crystals scattered through a black ocean. It holds me hostage for all its beauty on display. I can’t make sense of how the simplicity of the two can be so mesmerising.

"It's enchanting isn't it?" Luca says breaking my train of thought

"Yes, it really is." I smile

He looks out the window gazing towards the sky.

“It’s the little things like this that need to be appreciated more in life. We often seem to take them for granted. For instance, when I look up I'm greeted by a pitch-black sky that's surrounded by little specs of light." He glances at me.

"I see hope. Through a sea of darkness, there is a glimmer of light. A fighting chance.”

“You speak as if you're describing so much more than just the sky and stars? You describe it with such intensity.”

I glance at him and reach across the table placing my hand over his. He peers down at our touching hands and a faint smile reaches his lips.

Blissful silence lingers between us until the waitress brings us our menus. She spends more time hovering over Luca trying her best to get his full attention. I look at him as he continues to stare out the window. Oblivious to the attention he's currently receiving. I drink him in, marvelling at his good looks.

“Luca...” I gnaw my bottom lip.

“Si.” He says in his sexy accent.

"What do you remember most about me when I younger?" I ask wondering what he thought of me as a child.

"I remember you would come into the clinic dressed as a little diva. You would gain the full attention of the room as you walked in singing sweet melodies. You never once noticed the smiles you allured so effortlessly. Little Vanessa was bewitching then and you're still captivating today." He reaches across the table and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"You're a charmer, I'll give you that." I flush against his touch.

"What is your last recollection you have about the day Celeste took her life."

I straighten in my chair taken aback by his question.

"I..I.."

I reach forward and take a long sip from my glass of wine.

"Tesoro." He says gently realizing my discomfort with his choice of topic.

I sigh wishing he had asked me anything else that didn't relate to my past.

"I remember watching her slowly fade away from the strong will-hearted person I ever knew. She sobbed a lot when she and mum would argue on a daily. It pained me to watch the one person I cared deeply for perish before my eyes. Only to be replaced with a weaker version of herself." I swallowed back the tears that desired to break free.

"I miss her. Not a day goes by where I don't think about her or wonder what life would be like if she was still here with me. She was my only family and she removed herself from me. I was angry for a long time with her. I had to witness the sins my parents performed using me as bait to do one better than the other." I sniffle watching him through my tears.

"I didn't know how to protect her, let alone protect myself. I failed her and by doing so I ended up alone."

My heart rapidly beats against my chest deafening everything around me. I was seven years old when she took her life. I was still a baby and I relied on her so much. I miss her and my grief for her hasn't dampened much over the past couple of years.

"I had no idea how cut up you were Vanessa. I'm sorry for everything you have endured and I wish I was able to take some of your pain and wear it as my mine." His voice is webbed with remorse and it touches my grief-stricken soul with how despondent he sounds.

After our dinner, we exit the restaurant and meet Cullum outside. We enter the car and patiently wait for Cullum to drive.

“Sir?” He compels Lucas attention.

Luca looks into the rear-view mirror meeting Cullum’s stare.

“Penthouse, thank you, Cullum.” Cullum nods and pulls out into the traffic.

“I'd rather you take me home please Luca.” I look at him flabbergasted he didn't ask for my permission first.

Luca shifts in his seat to face me. “It’s late and we're closer to my place rather than yours. Cullum will take you home early in the morning to get changed and drop you off at the Academy for work in time.” He tells me not wanting to discuss this any further...

“But I don’t... need Cullum to take me home or to work In. The. Morning. If it’s too much trouble for you to see me home, I’ll get a taxi.” Luca closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Must you argue with me about everything?” He snaps coolly.

“We wouldn’t be arguing if you'd just asked me first Luca.” I shake my head as irritation starts to set in.

“We wouldn’t be arguing about this if you'd just go with the flow. Is it too much to ask you to spend the night with me?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I think I missed the part where you actually asked me!” I raise my voice at him.

“Merda! You really do have the power to drive me half completely insane.” He taps the side of his head with his index finger.

“Oh, no honey. I believe you've been completely insane since the day I met you. And the saddest part....” I look him dead in the eyes.

“I don’t think you have any idea just how insane you truly are” I chuckle trying not to have a full-on meltdown in front of him.

I turn away from his fierce glare and glance out the window. The demons of my past still haunt me. It’s a losing battle I’ve fought for many years. It still has me waking up screaming some nights without any recollection of my dreams. I'm afraid if he sees how broken I truly am. He won't want to fight for me anymore and I'll be left alone once again.

The car comes to a stop and I think to myself. Maybe he's come to his senses and Cullum will take me home.

I wishfully pray.