Chapter 24: Chapter 24

It was mid November. The rain still came like a rare visitor some nights. It was no longer as heavy as it used to be. It was just some patter on the roof for a short while and it is gone.

The plants in the garden were trying so hard to live. No one came to water them . The scent leaves were now scanty, filled with just their seeds that had dried and turned a dark shade of brown. The growing pepper had died just like that. The vegetables could still give leaves for cooking soup twice but that was all it had to give. Insects and pests were the fortunate habitats of the garden because it seemed no one remembered there was a garden in the compound anymore.

Kamsi stood at the spot she normally stayed to get a view of the garden from inside the house. It was the window at the dining. She no more had the will to help those helpless plants grow. She could do nothing now but gather the scent leaves seeds in a bowl to preserve it for the next year.

She just returned from work  before closing time. She needed to go to market but she forgot her ATM card which was in the bag she used the previous day. Mark had stopped giving her money for feeding since she started working. She did not bother to ask him since she could afford what they would eat. Their conversation was still scanty since Maka's coming which was a week ago - Just her greeting and him letting out an acknowledgement gruffly .

Kamsi picked her purse after stuffing all she needed inside it. She walked slowly down the stairs, running her open palm on the cream colored railing of the stairs. She was no longer the woman who hopped down the stairs with almost no worries. She was a different woman, one who seemed to have added twenty more years to her  twenty seven years of age just in a day.

She was fortunate to get a bike just outside the gate which was going to , 'Eke Okigwe ' , the town market. She directed the bike man to stop at the bank for her to withdraw before they proceeded to the market. He stopped her at the shop where she normally bought provisions . They sold at cheaper prices so even other traders in the market come to buy from them. She bought green tea and coffee for Mark then proceeded to buy crayfish, dried fish and other necessary things to stock the kitchen.

Her last bus stop in the market was always Nneka's stall. A very large umbrella served as a shade. It was supposed to be blue but rain, sun and dust had renamed it to a multi colored umbrella with just little patches of the original color. A wooden table stood beneath with the weight of different fruits, tomatoes and pepper displayed on it. On the floor beside the table were onions, vegetable leaves and more tomatoes.

"Customer !" Nneka called excitedly as she sited Kamsi.

"How you dey na? " Kamsi asked. She sat on a low bench behind the table.

She was not given a chance to reply as her little son ran out naked from the back of the building where she placed him to let out his stool. She ran to catch the boy who was already standing on the road and looking around with zeal as bike after bike sped past him. She lifted him to her shoulder and carried him back to the shade not minding his unwiped buttocks.

Kamsi sold oranges to a buyer in the short time Nneka was away tending to her baby.

"Chai you done try," she said when Kamsi gave her the money. The little boy was now dressed in a neat singlet and short.

"This your belle fit you o. See as you fine," she said, regarding Kamsi.

"God is good, " Kamsi replied with a laugh.

They mostly talked about nothing but Kamsi knew when things were not okay with the other woman. Unlike Kamsi, she did not know how to hide her emotions. She let it out on everyone including her customers. She yelled at them, especially those trying to price her wares at a very low rate. Today, Nneka was happy. She cheerfully called on customers and patiently attended to those who hearkened to her call.

Kamsi's eyes moved to the little boy who was now sitting on the sandy ground. His dress was without evidence of cleanliness. It made her smile watching him gather empty water cans for whatever agenda that was in his little head.

"Stand up from there! " His mother scolded.

The little boy stood up hurriedly wiping his sandy buttocks with his sandy hands. He hurried and sat on the bench Kamsi was sitting on.

" Customer, pack my vegetables and tomatoes for me na," Kamsi said.

" I know wetin you like. No worry," Nneka replied.

Kamsi just sat and she brought the basin of tomatoes for her to select, then she packed it with the vegetable leaves in another bag.

After paying the woman, Kamsi left with the smaller bag containing the vegetables and a Bagco bag containing other food stuffs.

There was a fast food just after the market. Kamsi stood outside that fast food bargaining with a bike man who had topped the transport price because of her bags.

"Abeg go, " Kamsi dismissed him when he was being stubborn and greedy. She noticed her husband's red Toyota Camry  parked outside the eatery. She felt lucky and stood waiting for him. She saw him walking out of the fast food with two white bags. He threw them into the back seat. She thought of moving in then but waited instead since he would drive past her.

She flagged him down as he approached her but he did not slow down or stop. It seemed as though he sped past her with more speed than was required. She was not cold but she hugged herself. She wrapped her arms around herself making the off- shoulder ankara gown she wore to look more fitting. She threw her head up to force back the tears that did not know when to shed. She knew her husband had seen her and she had also seen the woman that graced the seat beside him.

She hated that it made her thoughts a reality - Thoughts she did not like. The tears rolled down and she quickly wiped it. She flagged down a bike and hopped on not bothering to negotiate price. Maka had been right.

Timothy helped  Kamsi carry in the bags to the kitchen from the gate. She had wanted to cook but she had no appetite and her reason for cooking could not be her husband. She brought out a bowl of Ukazi soup from the freezer and microwaved it then she put it in a flask. She made no swallow before leaving the kitchen, leaving whoever had the  soup to sort out himself.

Without going upstairs, she entered one of the guest rooms down stairs. It was the one she packed her materials for painting. She would have loved to use the study room but it was a place Mark stayed often especially on nights he was ignoring her.

This guest room  had bed in it and a wooden cupboard close to the window. It was high enough to serve as a table. She opened up all the windows to let in a sufficient amount of light. She knew the natural light would fade soon as it was close to evening so she put on the bright fluorescent lights in the room. Positioning her canvas on the cupboard she started to draw. Giving light strokes to the canvas without meaning at first till she realized what she wanted to paint.

She stood in front of the canvas, trying not to feel anything but the need to draw. She shut her mind and locked up her emotions, believing she had cried too much than was healthy for one human.

She did not notice when outside got dark as she stood in front of the canvas. All her concentration was in the art she was bringing to life as she added colours to highlight the half moon in the night. She ran her  brush marking the edges of palm trees in her drawing giving them a darker shade to highlight their presence in the darkness.

She heard the sound of the gate opening and she walked to the front door. She opened the front door and returned to her painting. Standing for so long caused her some aching so she lay on the bed facing the stationary fan for a while before she returned to her painting with new determination. She did not learn it, drawing.. It was a natural gift. The walls of the University classroom only enhanced it.

She was still marking the lines around the trees in her drawing when Mark walked into the room. She had heard the sound of his leather slippers as it descended the stairs. He seemed to have gone to the kitchen before he finally walked into the room.

"Baby," he called, then sat on the bed and watched as she worked on her painting in silence.

"You have started painting again? " he asked. He had not been expecting her silence. It would have been easier for him if she said something so he would know what to say in his defense.

"Today was very stressful. Our workload today was something else but we survived. After work, I had to give a colleague a lift since it was... "

He was interrupted by Kamsi's laughter. A short laugh that came out like a scoff. She wanted to look at him but she knew what she would see still she dared. He looked just like himself, like the faithful husband she thought he was. She could not help wondering how many times he had lied to her with that face and she believed.

"How was your own day? " he asked.

Her painting was just the trees and a half moon beyond the trees  without the stars. She looked for a smaller brush to paint the tiny stars ignoring Mark's question.

" Was your own day stressful? " he asked. Kamsi could feel his eyes all over her.

She let out a sigh. She was going to cry no more. She realized Mark derived pleasure from seeing her in pain and she was not going to entertain him any longer.

"I went to the market after work today, " she said. She turned so he could be seeing her face and she, his.

" I came out from the market and as I waited for a bike to take me home, I saw you. I flagged you down as you drove past me but you did not stop because you were carrying your colleague, " She ended with making quotation marks in the air with her fingers as she said, 'Colleague'

Mark shook his head and laughed like she had said something unbelievable.

"firstly, I told you it was my colleague and secondly, I did not see you. I can not see my wife on the road and ignore her na. Are you even hearing yourself? " He said.

Kamsi would have believed him if she was still the woman she was before she landed on the floor with her head and tended to her pains alone. She was no longer that woman and Mark did not realize it yet. She turned back to her painting and began to paint the little stars close to the moon.

" I bought you fish. I noticed you love it so much these days," he said.

She shook her head slightly with a laugh. " Your soup is on the dining table. Use your fish and eat it."

As mild as her words were, it shocked him and stilled all of him. He had never met his wife being cold to him. He had never met the woman he met in the guest room before as a fact. This woman was different from the Kamsi that always displayed her emotions before him like goods for sale.

" I will be in the room after eating, " he said before leaving the room.

Kamsi moved to the bed and lay letting the tears fall one last time, she thought . His lies had sounded like the truth she used to believe . It hurt all of her to know that the man she had put her happiness on hold for all her years of marriage only knew how to be selfish, controlling, a core dictator without those principles he always spoke of having.

Mark must have waited for her to walk into the room that night but she did not. She went to her own room which she never used until that night . Clothes were piled on the bed so she pushed it closer to the wall to make space for herself. She hugged one of her pillows under the duvet. The cold that night was much but she loved it, she loved that it made her forget, to lose herself in sleep.