Chapter 91: Chapter 91

Tobias' POV

With my eyes closed, I heard someone opening the door of my hospital room. I did not bother to open my eyes, it was probably just some nurses trying to check my vitals. The night that Maive was kidnapped, Daxton Astrid's men brought me to the hospital. It was his order.

If not I was not brought to the hospital that time, I could have died from bleeding too much. Now, I am indebted to that Astrid.

I did not regret anything that night. I would be willing as always to give my life just to make Maive safe, I'll do everything for her. It just kind of hurts my ego that I am not enough to protect her, I felt like a loser, I love her but my strength isn't compatible to protect such a woman like Maive. I am weak to protect a diamond like her and it really hurts my ego. It has slapped me to tell me that I really don't deserved her.

I realized that it was Maive when I heard her breathing pattern. I knew her by that, even with my eyes closed. My plan was to act as if I am sleeping because I am ashamed that I was not able to protect her at that night, I put her into danger and if not for Daxton, she hasn't been able to come back. I don't have the courage to face her.

However, when she held my face, I wanted to tear up. And when she rested her face on my chest, I couldn't stop myself from touching her. Nevermind the ego that I have, I just really wanted to touch her... I wanted to hold her and it feels like perfect, she's perfect for me. It wasn't right, I know and thinking of it is breaking my heart.

I opened my eyes and I could feel all my wounds and pain disappearing n just a snap when I saw her, except that I could feel the pain in my chest. Even at the sight of her, it breaks my heart. I know, even then, that I couldn't have her. So I settled on being a brother to her... I settled on not telling her my true feelings.

However, I knew that she was not dense enough to not know that I love her more than a brother. She surely knows, she is smart. She is wise, from all the moments I have been with her, from all the times we shared... I knew that she's not numb, not to feel my true feelings for her.

"I really like you... so damn much," I said.

I know that I shouldn't be confessing right now. I know that this is not the perfect time for that. She will surely feel guilty. She will feel obligated because I tried to protect her. That is the least thing that I want. I don't want her to feel guilty.

I just really wanted to let it out after several years of wanting to tell her. I wanted to tell her even before we were just high school students, but I always thought that she was too young for that. I don't want her to grow up thinking about some stupid feelings that I have.

She looked nervous upon hearing those words. I could hear her heartbeat, it was not racing. It was just her normal heart beat. It was not the same when she was looking at that man... she looks nervous and unable to say a word and it is breaking my heart.

"Tobias..." She said.

I know that my confession would lead to this. I accepted this a long time ago. I knew that she was already bound to someone.

I wanted to hear from her that she doesn't like me that way. I wanted her to break my heart so I wouldn't dream of having a family with her. She should do that so I could stop myself from dreaming of a future with her. She needed to destroy me or else I'll still hope for us.

She opened her mouth, but there's no words that came from it.

Tell me, Maive. Go ahead.

She looked at me. She looked worried. She was pitying me. It was fine. Any emotion that she would give me, I would gladly accept it.

"I am in love with you, Maive. Ever since I laid my eyes on you." I said. Again, I just needed to let it out.

She looked at my hands that were helding hers.

"Tobias..." She called my name once again. I knew that it wasn't a good sign. "Please don't..."

That was all she could say. She doesn't want to hurt me, it was so obvious. But I was hoping that she would do it.

I smiled, "I just told you Maive. I am not asking for anything." It was the truth. I am not asking her to like me back. I shouldn't be that desperate for her. I should give her freedom on who she would choose to love.

Even before, I knew that she would never reciprocate the love that I have for her. I know that she is bound to someone. I was not blind to not see the mark on her neck. It was from a werewolf, I was sure of it. I just don't know who gave her that before. But now, I am starting to think about who it was.

Break my heart, Maive. Be cruel just for once. I badly need that or I'll go insane thinking that I might have the chance.

"Do you like someone, hmm?" I asked as I put the strands of her hair back on her ear.

I should praise myself for asking that casually when the thought of it really breaks me.

Her eyes widened for some seconds at me but she shifted back her gaze at my hands. She, then, nodded.

I smiled. I needed more than just her nodding. It would not break me enough. I want her to brutally break my heart, that's the only way for this madness to stop.

"Why don't you tell me about him?" I asked. I am really asking for her to shatter me.

She looked at me, a bit surprised that I was asking about that man when I just told her that I love her.

"I told you, Maive... I am not asking for you to like me back."

She feels guilty, I could see it in her eyes. She shouldn't be. I know from the very beginning that I won't have her... yet I am dreaming of a future with her. She's not my mate yet she caught my heart, she had me... and she's the only woman I am dreaming to be with.

I caressed her hair. "Go on, tell me about him." That's the only way she'll shatter this stupid heart.