Chapter 23: Chapter 23

JAYDEN

Bella wasn't present in school today. At first, I had thought that there was still time and she would come but when miss Lucy walked in to take Bella's class, I knew something was wrong. My mind drifted to what had happened between us and I felt so guilty yelling at her. I shouldn't have talked to her that way. It wasn't her fault she fell for me. Those words I said to her kept replaying in my head. They were harsh words I said without thinking. I had never thought she would fall in love with me. I had never thought she would develop feelings for me. So when she said the word I love you, I was startled. I was confused. I was surprised. I was disappointed. I said the words that came to my heart.

I couldn't stand seeing her way. That was the reason I left her alone. When I got home, Ethan noticed my mood and tried to find out what had happened and if the eat-out went well. I couldn't bring myself to tell him our lecturer just profess her love for me. I had to tell him everything went well, just to take him off my neck. My cover got blow when Miss Lucy called me to ask of Bella. I told her I left her on the way to the beach. Miss Lucy told me how worried she was and asked me to call her when I hear from Bella. I promised to do so and then cut the call. "Didn't you tell me, everything went well?" Ethan had asked in a yell

I had tried to ignore him but he wouldn't let me. So I told him the eat-out went well but we separated after the eat-out. He said I was supposed to follow her home and make sure she had arrived safely before coming home. After all, I have spent more time here than she has and knew most of the places. I told him I never thought that was necessary and had to apologize just let him free me. He did. Luckily on my side, Miss Lucy did not call back so I thought Bella should be back home. I slept peacefully, thinking less about Bella and what she had said. But now, not seeing her in school and thinking about what had transpired between us, I realized those words were too harsh. Maybe she was afraid to face me?. That's the reason she did not show up in school today. I made myself that was the reason for her absence.

Miss Lucy took Bella's class and although she taught us well, it wasn't fun like Bella's class. Bella had a way of making us laugh. She knew every one of us so well in a short period. She knows what would make each of us smile or even laugh. I sighed. I can't hide the fact that I miss her. I miss her teaching though. The class ended and Miss. Lucy told us Bella wasn't feeling too well, that was the reason she wasn't present today. Hearing those words my heart melted. I felt so guilty. A part of me kept telling me I was the reason Bella was sick. Miss Lucy left the class and Ethan stared at me. "What did you do to miss Bella?"

"What are you talking about?". I tried to play ignorance but Ethan was a smart persona and would not buy It.

"Don't give me that look and start talking"

I sighed. There was no way I could keep it from Ethan for long. I stood up and picked my bag up. "I will tell you everything when we get home"

He furrowed his brows. "Everything?"

I nodded and crossed my heart. "I promise"

He stared at me suspiciously for a second or two. Ok"

**

Ethan sat on the bed. "I am all ears"

I rolled my eyes and sat down. I have to tell the truth to Ethan, even when I know telling means being ready to be scolded by him. I sighed. "As I said before the eat-out went well. We talked about random things". I smiled. "I realized we have so many things in common. Except for baseball"

He rolled his eyes. "Then what went wrong?"

I stared at him and then sighed. "S-she. S-she told me she loves me"

He batted his lashes. "You mean she did that?". I nodded. "What was your response?"

"I-i was not expecting her to say that. So when she said it, I was met off guard. I..."

Ethan tapped his feet on the floor. You could tell he was becoming impatient. "Just tell me already. What was your reply"

I sighed. "I-i told her not to love me. I..."

"You said what?" Ethan asked, his eyes widened to a certain length.

I rolled my eyes. "I told her not to love me. Because I dont love her and won't love her"

"Do you know you're so heartless!!!" Ethan yelled. "How could you. How could you do that?. You did not care about how bad she will feel when you tell her those words?. Do you ever thought about how much sleepless night she had, trying to build up thr courage to tell you those words!!?" Ethan yelled

I groaned. "I feel so bad, ok?. You dont have to yell at me. My conscience is judging already"

"I should have suspected it when you came back yesterday. Your attitude was suspicious. But when you kept saying everything was fine, I had no option but to believe you. Gosh!!. I can't believe you did that!!"

"I'm sorry. I thought that was the right thing to do"

He scoffed. "Right thing to do?. Gosh. She wasn't in school today. I'm sure she fell sick because of that"

I sighed. "I am so sorry"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

I rolled my eyes. "I..."

He hissed. "You knew if I heard what you have done I will be so furious with you. That's the reason you kept telling me everything was fine. That's the reason you kept it from me"

I sighed. "I have done it already and I feel so bad about it. I don't know what to do now"

"You do". I furrowed my brows. "You have to go look for her and apologize"

I rolled my eyes. I can't do that."That is not an option. I don't think I can face her"

He hissed. "The courage you used in telling her not to love you. That's the same courage you will use to tell her you are sorry and do not mean those words"

"But I meant them. I do not love her. I am just sorry I used those harsh words on her"

He scoffed. "Whatever you think is not my business. Just make sure you find her and apologize"

I rolled my eyes. Ethan is so furious with me right now. Though I am not happy he is angry with me, I felt that is what I deserve for talking to Bella that way. "I don't know where to find her"

Ethan stood up. "That's yours to fond"

I stood up too. "Ethan, I know you can help me find her"

"I don't know where she lives and even if I do, I won't tell you a thing". He made to leave but held him. "Get your hand off me"

I held him tightly. "Come on, you know you are the only option I have now. Please. It wasn't my family I became cold-hearted. You of all people knew what I have passed through. I was afraid loving her would hurt. That's the reason I rejected her love"

He held my hand. "Jay, I know you've passed through a lot. But you can't keep morning. You can't keep closing the gate of your heart. I hope you understand soon that the love Bella has for you is real". He sighed. "I know where she is. I will take you there"

I smiled and placed my other hand in his hand. "Thank you"

He sighed. I will go change. I nodded. I knew I needed to see Bella and tell her how sorry I am for telling her those words. I hope she understands my reason for doing that and forgives me. I entered the bathroom to take my bath and then got dressed in a simple white t-shirt and blue jeans. Ethan wore blue ripped-off trousers and a red t-shirt. "Are you ready?" He asked. I nodded. He picked the car key on the table. "We won't be taking a taxi, so we can get there soon enough"

I furrowed my brows. "Isn't she taking in the staff quarters? a few blocks away"

He frowned. "So you knew she stays there?"

I rolled my eyes. "I have seen her a couple of times go there"

"You've stalked her enough to know she stays there"

"Let go please"

He rolled his eyes. "Ok"