Chapter 32: Chapter 32

Maximillion Cesantio

Ashton Searan

The name of person that I want to kill the most. I hate him with every single cell of my body. He's the guy who always try to take Rose away from me. Seeing him hugging Rose and seeing Rose so glad to meet him is just burning my heart.

I really wanted to be a monster and killed him but I controled myself so hard by keeping my mouth shut and looking away from them.

He asked me about my relationship with Rose in front of everyone is like mocking me, she picked me over him but she didn’t end up with me.

Not yet..

My appetite dropped immediately but I act like a girl if I just go away. That's so childish and stupid. I didn’t have any mood to talk and even looked at Rose because looking at her so happy meeting him crunched my heart.

I really don't have any mood after seeing that Ass*** guy. After we finish eating, we agreed to meet each other at the hotel. I just kept quite and nodded hearing Luke's statement. We all rented a car to stroll around and I got my own. Rose was with Luke and Angel with Alex.

I think I want to go for a drive to calm down my burning heart.

"Okay, let's go." Luke said and I turned my body towards my car.

"I'll go with Max." Rose said and that made me froze. I turned to her disbelief.

"What?" Luke asked her disbelief.

"I'll go with Max." She repeated.

"We'll just see you there.” Angel said and Alex nodded. Luke and the Norths left first when she suddenly stood beside me looking at me. I'll be lying if I'm not happy that she wants to ride with me but I still in a jealous mode. I might hurt her by my bursting emotions.

First Jeremy and the second one got me crazy even more.

"Come on." She said and I nodded. We walked to the car and I opened up her door first. She smiled to me and got inside. I walked to my side and got in. I started the car and drove away from that neighbourhood. Turning on the GPS and started following the directions.

"Max.” She called.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Let it out." I turned to her for a moment and looked at her with a questioning eyes.

"I know you're mad, let it out." She said and I didn’t answer her because I don't know what to answer that statement.

"I'll drop you to the hotel first okay?" I said.

"I'll go with you if you want to go for a drive." She stated and I shook my head.

"I'll take you-"

"Just let it out Max.”

"I'm not angry." I lied.

"You can't lie to me, I know you more than you know." She stated angrily.

"Rose, I can't.”

"Stop there!" She pointed at a small park and we can park there. I drove into the parking lot there and regreted as I parked my car.

"You're mad, you're sad, you're jealous." She stated and I just looked straight to the front, not able to look at her. She stated that but I stayed silent.

"You can still be yourself Max, I like when you change but holding your emotions and feelings is just.."

"I'm not mad or sad.”

"I once regret for choosing you over Ashton, I even thought why do I love you that much when someone loves me more than I love you? Why did I choose you? Why did I choose you when I know trouble will come along the way? At one point, I'm tired loving you and I rather pick being loved by someone because I'm tired of getting hurt." She said and my heart started to hurt more as I heard that. I still looked straight not wanting to look at her.

"But when I get to think for quite a long time.. I know why I love you so much Max. There's no reason to love someone, I don't have any reason why I loved you. You just took my heart and that's it. I don't regret anything since that day. You're the best thing that happen to me and the worse thing at the same time." She continued and that got me bad. I swallowed the emotions within me and it started to come out one by one. This was one of our first proper talk.

"I know you Max, I know your positive side and I know your negative side. I love every of your flaws. I know everything about you so you can't lie to me." I closed my eyes. Everything that she said was right, everything.

"Let it out" Just by saying that, I took a really deep breath and let out my feelings. I punched the steering wheel with full power and then closed my eyes. I held the steering wheel and put my head there. I was so piss and mad at myself.

"I choose you over him Max, until forever it won't change the fact that I chose you more than him. Stop hating Ashton, I bet he's already moving on since long long time ago." Why are you so kind and just.. why did I treat you so badly? Why did I abandon you? Why didn't I love you and cherish you since the first time I met you? Why?

I don't deserve you.. not a bit.

I think she deserves to be happy and I'm not the one who can make her happy. My confidence just dropped on the lowest point. I have hurted her so badly, I cut her heart. I don’t even deserve her forgiveness. Even though she forgives me, the big scar still be there.

I don't deserve her.. not a bit even I love her. I want her again but I don't deserve her.

"I regret all the things that I did to you Rose, I don't deserve you a bit. You're a jewel but I'm too stupid to realize that I already got a jewel from the start. Instead cherishing it.. I hurted you. I broke you." I said and it's painful to say that. She just stayed silent.

"You deserve it if you learn to start cherish it Max, no matter how I try.. it still belongs to you Max. It still belongs to you." That made me turn my head to her. She was looking outside the window and suddenly she turned to me.

Our eyes locked.. we stayed like that for awhile.

"I love you Rose.. so much. The fact not being able to touch you, to kiss you, to hug you are my biggest fear. I realized how much I love you when you left me. The amount of hurt that I gave you is not equal with all the treatments that you gave me." I said truthfully and suddenly she put her hand on my cheek caressing it.

I felt the warmness start to travel around my body, we both just looked at each other until I saw tears filling her eyes. Seeing her cry making my heart broke, knowing I'm the one who cause it made it more worse. A tear left her eyes and she wiped it quickly.

"I really want to have a last chance Rose. I really do but I don't think I have that anymore. I already ruined it.. ruined every chances that I had." I said truthfully and she smiled.

"Then make me fall in love with you all over again." She suddenly stated, my eyes widen.

"Show me.. make me madly fall in love with you again Maximillion, show me that you've change, show me that you really want me back, show me how much you love me." She took my hand and caressed it, I really don't know what to say. I was speechles.

"Can you Max?" She asked and a smile appeared on my face.

"I swear Rose. I won't make you disappointed this time. I'll prove it to you. I'll prove it to you how much I love you and I will do anything to get you back." I swear with all my life.

"It won't be easy Max.”

"I don't care.. I'll get you again Rose. I promise, I swear."