Chapter 4: Chapter 4

I woke up to the feeling of heat. My eyes fluttered opened to see that I had woken up with the sun. I slowly sat up and stretched my arms up. I release a great big sigh. What a night. I was up for most of it. In pain and all. I touched my lower abdomen but whimpered. It was still very sore. I turn and climbed out of my bed. My legs were shaking slightly. I presume my body is still in shock of my heat. I'm weak for a couple of days after heat. Strangely enough, it only lasts for one night. I suspect this is because of the intensity. Most female wolves have pain for a couple of days, but not me. Mine is just one whole night of complete and utter torture. I always fear the next time it comes. Females in my family line had this as well. As you get older, it gets worse, that is if you do not have a mate. Some females in my blood line even died because they could not find their mates' and the pain was so great that their bodies would shut down as a protective mechanism, however this killed them. And now I fear that I will get to that point as well. Just the knowledge that it will be worse next time has me weak to my knees.

I look to my dresser. I take a deep breath.

One step at a time I heard my wolf say. With each step I took towards the dresser, I felt as if I was going to collapse. My abdomen was still really sore, so I crouched over slightly like an old lady. When I finally got to the dresser, I felt like I just completed a marathon. I look at my clothes. The easiest thing to get into would be just a simple T-shirt dress.

I do my hair up in a messy bun then slowly walk towards the door. I slowly open, but something heavy lyes against it that falls. I took a step back. I see Noah lying on the floor in front of my door. My heart moved inside of me when I realized he was guarding me all night. Making sure I was safe. I kneel down and cupped his cheek, "Noah," I whispered.

His eyes flutter open. They weren't black anymore, they were their crystal blue self. He looked at me confused, "Who're you?" he says in his english accent.

I was taken back by his question, "Ummm, don't you remember? its me? Mia?" He still didn't recognize me. I took a step back when he was getting up from the ground. He stumbled a bit. I took a hold of his arm to stable him, "Be careful you're still healing." He frowns down at me. "Healing? from what?"

"I was wondering the woods when I found you unconscious. You were in a fight I presume. I dragged you back to my cottage to nurse you."

He looks away from me and inspects his surroundings. He sees all the herbs and salves I have on the shelf, "You're a healer." He stated.

I nod my head, "Yes." I took a cautious step towards him, "Do you not remember anything?"

"I vaguely remember you, but I thought i just dreamt you."

I shook my head, "No, you were a little loopy when you woke up. It would have been from you wounds and your fever."

His brows pull together even further, "Wounds?"

I dragged him towards the mirror to show him what he looked like. I inspected himself. He turns around to see the biggest wound. The slice on his back. He turns to me and nods, "Thank you. I should leave now, but I am grateful for your hospitality."

"I don't think you should leave yet. Your wounds are still very fresh. and besides there is a storm coming in a couple of hours. There's no use. Stay until the storm has passed."

He looks at me then, then outside. He walks out the door and stands on the deck. He raises his head and sniffs the air. Noah turns around and walks back inside, "You're right, there is a storm coming. I will stay until it passes." I nod my head.

"Where is your bathroom?"

"First right down the hall."

He nods his head towards me as he walks by. I hear the small click of the door shutting. I go to sit down and take a deep breath. He doesn't remember last night. He doesn't remember anything. I sign and lay back against the chair. Maybe its a good thing he doesn't. He wouldn't want someone like me anyways. Maybe I was dabbling too deep into fantasy. Our connection was just a figment of my imagination.

***

It had been a couple of hours since I saw Noah. He's been in that bathroom all day. In a way I was disappointed. He's much more reserved and cold now that he is clear headed. Why can;t he just stay loopy and sweet forever!

I'm cutting vegetables to go with the roast lamb I'm cooking. After the lamb is ready, I use left over juice it left behind to make gravy. Once everything is done I walk towards the bathroom. I knock on it lightly. No response.

"Ummm, Noah? T-here's some dinner if you would like some?"

There was no response at first, then I heard him say, "Yes thank you." I smile to myself. I went back to the kitchen to cut up the meat. Noah comes out. It seems he had a shower or bath maybe? He was still topless. It was hard to not look at him. He had droplets running down his body still. Running down towards his-

Noah clears his throat, "Shall we eat then?" I felt my cheeks heat up, "Ummm...uh, y-yeah. Yes we should. Please take a seat." He does. I lay his plate in front of him. "Would you like a drink?"

"Water please." I go and get a cold water and put it in front of him. I then take my own seat to eat. It was silent. All you could hear was the clinking and clattering of our knives and forks.

"So when will you be leaving after the storm?"

"Tomorrow."

I nod my head politely, "Isn't that too soon? Shouldn't you wait for the storm to completely pass over?" I ask hopefully.

"No. It passes tonight. I will be leaving at sunrise tomorrow." He says with no emotion.

"Oh." Is all I said. What else can I say to that? He is acting to cold and withdrawn.

"What pack are you from?" He asks.

I was taken a back by his question, but I guess it is the general conversation topic for wolves that just met. "Ummm, I used to be part of Alpha Kendrick's pack."

His eyes widen in shock, "Were you now? Then what happened?"

I didn't look at him, "I was banished."

"Why?"

"Because someone accused me of doing something I did not do."

"So you were innocent? why did you not speak up to defend yourself?"

"No one would believe a fifteen year old girl. Would you?"

His brows scrunch together, "They cast you out at fifteen?"

I nodded my head and kept eating. "Yes, I've been out here for six years."

"Alone?"

I nod my head, "I get the odd visit here and there. I haven't for a while though.

"Did your parents do nothing? Did your father not challenge the alpha to keep you in?"

"My parents are dead. My mother died giving birth to me and my father was killed."

Noah didn't say anything and I didn't expect him to. I stood up from my chair and grabbed our finished plates. I took them to my little sink and started to clean up. I heard the dragging of a chair being pulled out. He must've went back to the bathroom. I turned around to clear the rest of the table, but stumbled right into Noah. My hands were on his chest to stop myself from totally falling all over him. I should've dropped my hands once I was steady...but I didn't. I stood there looking at my hands rested on his chest. But the strange thing was that he didn't pull out. I slowly raised my eyes towards his crystal blue ocean. He was already looking at me with intense eyes. My heart was beating like a hummingbird and lungs were panting for more air. We both didn't say anything. We just stood there looking at each other. It was like we both knew that there was a connection, but we didn't want to acknowledge it because if we did, then there would be no stopping it.

Noah took a step closer. Our chests were almost touching. He leaned forward without breaking eye contact. Noah then broke the silence, "I'm sorry for your loss." He straightened up to his full size...a giant. I didn't say anything. I just turned around and continued washing the dishes. I couldn't bring myself to say anything. I needed to try and break this bizarre connection between us. I can't feed into it or it will just make it harder.

I hear Noah's retreating foot steps. He went out the door. I peaked through the window a little and saw him sitting on my outside chair. I looked away and just kept cleaning.

"Don't do anything stupid Mia," I told myself. After I cleaned, I took out two mugs. I decided that because it was a rather cold night, I was going to make us some tea. I brought the hot mug outside where Noah was sitting. "Hey, I thought you'd like a cup of tea after your meal?" I laid the mug on the coffee table. I looked at him and found that he was already staring at me. I looked down and turned around to walk back inside to have my tea in there. I don't think he wants my company. "Thank you," I heard him say. I stopped. I gazed over my shoulder at him. He hadn't touched his tea yet, he was just watching me. I nodded my head towards Noah and said,"Your welcome," I then turned away from him and went back inside, alone.

I took my cup of tea and sat at my table. Thats all I did. I just sat down. It's weird. He is having tea inside and I am having tea outside. Maybe I should just go out there. Be bold for once Mia! But what if he doesn't want me around him? Maybe he doesn't want me to talk to him? "Ugh!"

screw it all! I stood up with my tea and stomped towards the door in confidence. I can do this! I opened the door to step out, but as I was stepping out, he was stepping in. We smashed right into each other. I accidentally poured tea all over him. We both froze. What the hell just happened? "I am so sorry!" I exclaimed.

"Shit" he muttered I pulled him inside and shut the door, "I'll get you another shirt just wait here." I rush to my bedroom and look into my closet. I can't believe I just did that. Idiot! I spilled tea all over him! Ugh! Why can't everything just be how I plan instead turning out to be something embarrassing! I see a big navy blue t-shirt that should fit him.

"Hey here's a-" I choke on my words when I see that his back is to me...and shirtless. He has no shirt. Has no shirt! Therefore his skin and body is on display for me to see. He has one Muscled body. I see every kind of muscle defined on his back. I know I've seen him without a top before when I was doing up his wounds, but seeing him standing on his own while dressed like that looks totally different. I see that he hasn't seen me yet. I quickly retreat back into the hall way. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Don't do something stupid Mia. I turn to enter into the main room. "Here's a shirt." I said with my arm extended out. He turns around and...I felt my cheeks betray me when I saw the rest of his body. My eyes are stuck on it. His body is literally pure muscle. What the hell? He has the body of a...a...a God. I see that he has a couple of tattoos here and there. How did I not see them when I was stitching his wounds? I guess I missed out on ALOT when I was cleaning him.

Noah takes the shirt from me. Our hands brushed slightly. I instantly retracted my hand because I felt an electrifying sensation. My heart spiked up. But I ignore it as if it didn't happen. I can't let him effect me. I can't get attached. It seems he has the same idea since when he woke up. "Thank you," He said quietly. He put it on. It fit perfectly. I saw that his face seemed displeased for some reason. "What's wrong? Do you not like the shirt?"

"Why do you have a male's shirt?" He asked bluntly.

"It was my father's. I took some of his shirts as comfy clothes." My mind becomes muddled when I saw his body relax. "Why?" I asked.

His face becomes hard when I asked. "I just didn't want to be wearing your male's shirt is all."

"Oh I don't have a mate." He nodded his head. Again! He seemed content with my answer. Silence filled the room. We just stood there watching each other.

Noah breaks the silence by clearing his throat, "Well...good night then."

He snaps me out of my haze, "Oh of course! Yes...ummm Good Night...and again, I'm sorry that I spilled tea all over you."

He shakes his head, "Don't worry about it." With that said and done, I turn to leave, but walk into a chair. I tumble around it. I turn back to look at him and chuckles, "Stupid chair haha..." I fast walked back to my room and shut the door and groaned. I can't believe I actually did that. I leaned against the door and slowly sunk down to the floor with my knees tucked against my chest, "I am the most awkward person in the whole wide world" I said to myself.

NOAH

After she left I sagged into one of the chairs. I rub my face down with my hands and groan. I don't know why, but I am extremely attracted to her. She is so beautiful and sweet. Such the opposite of me. I can see that she feels the connection as well. And her smell...her smell is intoxicating. Why is this happening? I can't go there. I have a duty as an Alpha to full fill. I can't let my emotions get the best of me.

I look down at the shirt she gave me. I feel so protective of her as well. When she gave this to me I was filled with rage. I hated the thought that maybe another male has touched her. But when she told me it was her father's I was extremely relieved.

I took a deep breath. I can't let her in. Not just for my sake, but for hers as well. I am too dark to taint her light. I couldn't even take care of my wife, how does she expect me to take care of her too? My heart hurt when I thought of My wife...Eleanor. It hurts to think about her and it hurts sometimes to think of him...my son, Keith. He has grown up so fast. He's around 7 and a half years old now. I remember Eleanor loving him so much. She would anything for him.

Mia reminds me of her a lot. Mia. She is beautiful and kind. She's a healer too. Maybe we can- I shake my head at the thought. No. NO! I have to stay away from her. I can't even think about doing that. I shouldn't be around here. I have to leave as soon as the storm passes. I cannot let her in. If I do we may both be destroyed.

I lye down on the couch and look up at the ceiling. I know I am a cold person. I don't feel much emotions at all. But there is a reason. I've trained myself to not feel much for protection. If I didn't feel much then I was protected from the wall and I can't find the off button. There are days where I wish I could feel things, but I just can't. Even if I try my hardest to feel...I can't. Even with my wife. Don't get me wrong! I did love Eleanor, but not in the way she deserved. I couldn't give her the full experience of what being loved felt like. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Sometimes I wish that I didn't exist because the life I am living now is hardly a life at all. This was my favorite part of my day. Sleep. I love the feeling of slowly fading off into a place where you and say and be anything you want. I can pretend that I don't hate myself.

"Hello there little boy! Why don't you come out to play?" Says the man. I look at him...he had dark brown hair and eyes as black as his soul. His teeth were perfectly white and straight. His suit showed off how wealthy he was. He had his hand extended out, waiting for me to take it. But I didn't want to...I wanted to go back to my mother and father. I took a step and whimpered in the corner of my cell. The man retreats his hand back to his side. He looks at me and shakes his head. "I don't want to do this to you boy, you know I don't, but it seems if you don't do what your told...bad things will happen to you." He took a step closer to me to try and grab me. But a hand comes out of the cell next to mine and swipes that big scary man with his claws. The man yells out and stumbles back. I look to my rescuer who was a boy know older than me. He growled and snarled at the man. His eyes held vengeance and defiance. The man became angry with the boy, "You little shit! You will have 10 lashes and take on the boy's lashes as well!" He stomped out and ordered one of the guards to take my savior. The guards took the boy out of his cell. The boy looked at me and smiled before he got pulled away into the whipping room. I was shocked. He took my lashes away from me. I felt so grateful. The boys saved me. I sat back in my cell and waited for my rescuer to come back. The guards came with a strange looking boy and put him in the cell where my rescuer was. The boy flopped on the ground a groaned. He his back looked as if it had no skin left. His face was all swollen and bleeding. But his eyes held something strong inside them. Thats when I realized...he was my rescuer. He turned to me and smiled. He crawled towards me with the bars in between us. He stuck his hand out, "Hello there, my name's Xander." He was American. With a shaky hand I took his hand and shook it, "My name's Noah." Xander nods his head, "It's nice to meet you." I leaned against the wall,

"I'm sorry you had to take my punishment." I said softly.

Xander waves his hand, "Don't even worry about it. You're new here...no one should get punished on their first day."

I smiled softly. He was so nice to me. My first friend! "Well...thank you."

Xander nodded his head in acknowledgment to my gratitude.

"Can I ask a question?" I asked.

"Yeah sure."

"Who is that man?" Xander's eyes instantly darkened. They held so much anger and promise, "Matheseus." he whispered. His name gave me chills.

"Don't worry Noah...no one's gonna hurt you."

Xander tried his best to protect me, but there was some things he couldn't protect me from.