Chapter 35: Chapter 35

THIRTEEN

Lily's honestly the most impatient person I've ever known and probably will ever know. She's also got way too much energy for it to be legal.

She claims it's because she's been a 'sleeping beauty' for the last four years and is finally free to let out all her energy. I supposed that's acceptable...if she weren't using all that pent-up energy on me.

I'm almost wishing Devin was awake cause never mind the chaos these two would cause together. They're probably the only ones that can actually stand to be with each other for longer than a couple hours.

I said almost wishing.

Some people are just better in small doses. And no matter how long we've been apart and how much I missed her...she's one of them.

"Lily stop that," I order and she looks directly at me before poking him again. "Poking him isn't going to wake him up any faster," I grumble.

I'm currently sitting by Jason's bed, Cody and Chase are standing nearby, and Lily's poking at Devin.

Even though he's clearly out of it and she's never met the guy, it's like she can just sense the other insane person in the group and just gravitates towards him.

"How would you know?" Lily counters, poking at his face again. "Maybe if you'd poked at me I would've woken up sooner."

"You weren't supposed to wake up at all according to the doctors," I mutter and she stops poking at Devin's face to look over at me.

"Really?" I nod in response to her. "I should try setting a record for the number of times a coma patient wakes up when they're not supposed to."

"No freaking way." I hiss through gritted teeth. "You are not doing that to me again."

"Doing what to you? I didn't do anything to you. I was sleeping." She smiles mischievously at me and restarts poking at Devin again.

"I will kill you myself if you do that again." I threaten and she smiles at me.

"If you do, I'd still have seven lives left."

I groan and rub at my face with my hands while both Cody and Chase stare at her in amusement.

It's not so amusing when you're the one who has to babysit her. Let's trade places.

I'm jolted out of thoughts when the machine hooked up to Devin begins to beep wildly. And I watch in horror as his heart rate flatlines.

"Cody get a doctor!" Chase shouts as he runs over and pushes Lily aside.

Lily runs over to the door and locks it before Cody can get a doctor.

"What the hell Lily?" Cody shouts and she just calmly strolls over to Devin's side.

"You all need to take a chill pill." She says simply as she shoves Chase out of the way. "There's no doctor needed." She mutters as she walks over and picks at the wiring hooking everything to Devin's chest.

"I knocked one of the wires loose." She explains as she puts the wire back in place and the machine stops beeping, going back to normal.

Everybody seems to let out a breath of relief and I try to steady my racing heart. I put my head in my hands and my elbows on my knees.

These people are going to be the death of me.

"You guys really need to relax. You're all so jumpy, so tense...let's go to an amusement park!"

"No way. Not happening." I shake my head vigorously. "I went with you once and that was enough to never go with you again."

"Oh come on, I promise I won't bring a dog this time. Rabid or otherwise."

"Still not happening."

She grumbles a ton of curse words under her breath before going back to poking Devin.

"Why don't you come over here and poke Jason?" I suggest, trying to keep her from knocking another wire loose and giving everyone a heart attack again.

She crinkles her nose up, as if in disgust. "He's no fun, I can tell." She points at Devin. "This one's loads of fun...if he were awake that is."

"How can you tell?" Cody asks her.

Yes, take her attention off me, please.

"Because even though you've all clearly tried to get it out...you've all got paint in your hair except this one." She points at Devin. "Leads me to believe he was responsible, and therefore more fun."

She goes back to poking him.

"That's not going to help Lily," Chase tells her this time.

"No? Do you think slapping him will?"

She raises her hand in the air and Chase is across the room so fast it's almost scary as he grabs her wrist and slowly lowers her hand back down to her side.

"No, I don't think slapping him will help at all," Chase says as he releases her wrist.

She nods in understanding and goes back to poking him. The side of his face is beginning to turn red...but the minute Chase is far enough away...

She raises her hand up and smacks him.

"LILY!" All three of us shout in unison.

She shrugs innocently and stares at Devin. "Dammit," She mutters. "I was sure that would work...let's try again."

"NO!"

But before any of us can do anything she slaps him again, and raise her hand to strike him a third time.

"Third time's the charm." She says in a sing-song voice.

Her hand doesn't make contact with his face this time. Instead, it makes contact with the floor as her chair is shoved over and she goes spilling out of it and onto the floor.

I would've thought I'd imagined it. If not for him trying to block out the blinding white lights after shoving over Lily's chair before she could slap him a third time.

"I agree...she is worse than me."

I let a wide smile fall onto my face and get to my feet, walking over the end of his bed and sitting on it.

"Devin!" Both Chase and Cody call out as they too make their way over to him.

"Told you third time's the charm," Lily says smugly as she pulls herself up off the floor. "What up dead dude? Name's Lily." She holds out her hand for him to take and he just narrows his eyes at her instead.

"I know who you are and you expect me to shake your hand after you slapped me?"

"What's the problem?" She questions like she's genuinely confused. The mischief and devilish intent shining in her eyes says overwise.

Devin eyes her cautiously, but the same look shines in his eyes as they size each other up.

I shake my head. There's no way I'm leaving either one of them alone together for a second. That's way too much mayhem, in too little time.

"Need anything Devin?" Chase questions him and Devin just shrugs.

"I guess a glass of water would be appreciated."

Chase nods and heads off out of the room.

"I'm going to get the doctor," Cody says as he pats Devin on the shoulder with a smile before following Chase out of the room.

Devin looks from me to Lily, and back to me. I can see the millions of questions in his eyes, the gears turning in his head before he finally speaks.

"Hey, Lily can you give me and Thirteen a moment alone?" Devin questions, never taking his eyes off me.

Lily looks between the two of us. "Alright, I can take a hint." She starts to close the door behind her as she leaves the room.

"Don't worry, I'll go tell Cody you're two-timing him." She wiggles her eyebrows suggestively and laughs, dodging the pillow Devin pegs at her.

"Now you don't have a pillow," I tell him with a smile.

He smiles back at me. "Least of my concerns."

It's quiet for a long time before Devin breaks as per usual.

"Is it true?" He finally asks.

"Is what true?"

"What Elaine said about your brother."

I let out a shaky breath and get to my feet, turning my back on him as I walk over the window. I leave my crutches by his bed. I place my hands on either side of the window sill and stare out at the street below.

"I was kind of half hoping you'd forgotten about that," I mutter with a forced laugh. I stare out directly in front of me out at the city.

"Yeah." I finally mutter so quietly, I'm not sure he hears me. It's quiet for what seems like an eternity before he finally speaks again.

"He's dead?" He may ask it like a question, but his tone of voice suggests that he already knows the answer.

"Yeah," I reply quietly, tears beginning to prick at the edges of my vision.

Devin's quiet again, as if preparing himself to ask what I know he so desperately wants to. His voice is quiet as he speaks, obviously dreading the answer he already knows I'm going to give him.

"Who killed him?"

He knows the answer. I can hear it in his voice, but he's hoping he's wrong. Hoping I'm going to deny it...or confirm what he's already figured out.

"I did."

My response from him is silence. I don't turn around to face him. I don't want to see his face. I continue on talking before he finally decides to say something.

"He was trying to get around me to get to Lily." My tone of voice is defeated. "He was trying to finish her off...He had climbed up on this stack of crates, trying to get around me, and...I just..."

I take a deep breath before continuing on, my voice hoarse. "I had to make a choice, Lily or J.D...and I chose Lily."

I duck my head, and for the first time in over four years...I let the tears fall silently down my cheeks.

"You shot him," Devin states, realization dawning on him. "That's why you won't fire a gun."

I keep my back to him but nod. "Every time I lift a gun...I just...I watch him die all over again, and it kills me." I keep my voice steady and firm despite the tears running down my cheeks. "And not a day goes by when I don't think about it. When I don't regret not finding another way."

"You never told Zero the truth," Devin says after a long while of silence.

I shake my head. "No. Call me stupid, call me foolish, call me whatever the hell you want." I mutter. "But I didn't want my brother to die a traitor."

I shake my head before running my shaky hands through my hair. "I didn't want him to be remembered that way. I wanted him to  be remembered for all the good he'd done. For the hero, he once was...not the traitor Garrett turned him into...I wanted him to be remembered as my brother, not a stranger."

It's quiet and I do my best to keep from reliving it. To keep from playing it all out in my head again. To try and forget.

But forgetting is impossible. It always has been. I've been reliving it for years.

How I begged him to stop, to help me. How his eyes glared into mine like he didn't even know me. Like I was the thing he hated most. Like I was no longer his little sister, and just a mission he needed to complete. To remove from the picture.

How he broke my wrist when I tried to get him to stop when I refused to fight back. He'd wanted a challenge he'd said. How I'd fought back and he'd shot me...then laughed. How he smiled when Garrett was torturing me and I pleaded with him to help.

I'd never pleaded or begged or cried since that day. He'd made feel weak, like he always had when we sparred. The only difference was that he'd always give me pointers, he'd always help me back up to my feet then and we'd go at it again.

He was a lot like Devin in the sense that he didn't like to showcase his fighting skills, didn't like to lead. Because even though I was the leader of my original team...

He'd always been the best agent our team, and the agency had ever seen.